So you think love is enough to get your marriage or long term relationship through the difficult times. Well think again. It’s not that easy. A complete contentness is vitally important to the health and welfare of your relationship.

Of course you have to have all the main ingredients that make a great relationship casserole. Open communication, a deep sense of loyalty and respect a heavy helping of friendship are vitally important. Any one of these missing ingredients can doom all the work and time that both of you have invested into the relationship. However you have to feel content.

In other words an intense feeling of being content with each other is essential. Content is defined as not wanting more. Are you wanting more than what you’re getting in your relationship. If the answer is yes, then it’s time to talk with your partner and open the line of communication.

When one party feels neglected or somehow overlooked this can lead to infidelity or cheating. Relationships that experience infidelity usually have that person looking for something that he or she is not getting in the relationship. It could be a number of things like the loss of sexual appetite, the feeling of you don’t understand me anymore or financial insecurity.

How many marriages have ended due to one of these issues? Although there are no stats that include these problems I would venture a guess and say that 100% of all divorces and long term relationship break-ups are due to one or more of these things.

Relationships tend to fall into a regular routine. And before you know it you’re stuck in a rut and end up “settling”. There is a huge difference between settling and being content. When you settle you are missing something when you are content you are looking for nothing else.

Love only goes so far in a relationship work will take you to being complete. As anyone who is in a committed relationship will tell you, love is most certainly not enough when it comes to finding happiness in a partnership. Trust, communication, respect, and reciprocal friendship are important components in any relationship and the death of any one of these essential ingredients can often spell disaster for the relationship as a whole. But the fact remains that in the course of our union we will all be faced with an inevitable love test that can have one of several outcomes – the ending of the relationship, the continuing of the relationship that is now forever damaged by the event, or the beginning of a new chapter in the relationship – one that signifies a much stronger union and the promise of a happy future.

One such love test is one in which the trust of either or both partners is tested in the face of infidelity. There are many reasons that infidelity occurs in a relationship but it is – without fail – always indicative of a much larger problem in the relationship. In most cases, the partner who discovers the infidelity will immediately end the relationship or perhaps continue in the relationship because there are children involved or financial reasons that make the continuance of the union a practical decision. In either case, the couple has lost the opportunity to emerge from the experience stronger and much more committed to a future in which they both feel a part. If both parties are invested in the continuing of the relationship, professional counselling can provide a chance to get to know each other again and rebuild a solid foundation of trust. As incredible as it may sound, this love test can be one – that if passed – can deliver the couple to new heights of love and partnership.

Many a couple has experienced a love test in which finances are the star. Money is one of the prime factors over which couples argue and even separate. This often comes from a base history of handling money differently – based upon the ways in which we were all taught to think about finances from our parents. When two people come together with very different financial compasses, they are often left feeling frustrated and disrespected by each other. There is financial counselling available that works with couples of this very kind. Such counseling allows couples to move past their preconceived ideas about money and reformulate a shared goal and plan for finances in their relationship. If statistics are correct, then 50% of couples who face this financial love test have failed – losing each other to their different feelings about money. But if you approach this situation as a challenge and seek resources that can help you redefine your relationship in this capacity, you can move on to a respectful relationship with shared values.

Every couple will face a love test in their lifetime; such is the inevitability of love. But if you love and respect each other enough, you can move through the love test and emerge into a place of light, love, and happiness.

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